Sunday, February 28, 2010

Assalamualaikum, my dear lady

To future lover, 28 February 2010

My dear lady, assalamualaikum.

Myself shall not wrap around my oblivious rational thought that I'm now writing you a love epistle. To you, whom I'm sure in the grace of Allah, I shall pray for your well being. To you, whose warmth is my source of smile, shall be loved dearly and with Allah's merciful willing, I would not forsake you.

In my entire 20 years, my lady, I have been waiting. Some peasants say it is half timing and the other half's pure luck.

Shall I be devoted to it ?
Shall I turn away in shame of your absence?
Shall this heart loathe the continuous quest of love?
Mostly, shall I be loved by you?

I don't know. I don't. Then I beseech grace from Allah.

I'd ask from Him, every evening, after every recital, in my every minute shaky breaths, for you to transcend from this suffocating thin air so I would breath easy again.

For I'm sure neither I be acquainted with you nor hear your presence in this short uncertain future hereby I would, insyaAllah, full heartily love you. Thank you. Thank you my dearest right well-beloved hope for the counsel your future-attendance has put in me and for the dream I beseech solace from.

I've been thinking a lot lately about you, whoever you are. Would you walk with me hand in hand through the thick and thin ? Would my bad times push you apart? Shall it pleases you to hear of my welfare ?

Being a humble sinner I am, if you could be content with me, my poor form and sum, I would be the happiest man. Like how Nora Doyle had looked upon those girls in her time, marrying the man they thought they could live life with and said she'd rather wait for the one she couldn't live without. I believe that. I shall let time devours every inch of my vigor as I wait for you.

No more to you for now. May Allah keeps you in His grace and blessing, insyaAllah.

Your future own
Che Engku Amin Che Engku Aziz

Baru....

dengan menulis ini, aku sedang mencarikkan sedikit masa hadapan aku dengan tidak membaca

cystic fibrosis transmembrane conductance regulator

yang mungkin masuk untuk exam khamis ni. sigh..

Apa apa sajalah... Oh yang dulu bukan cirit birit. Digestion system mmg under permanent revonation. Selalu sakit perut. Tambah pula entah macamana aku blh dapat ingrown toe nails pulak. Babi aku boleh pulak pijak kaki aku masa dinner semalam. Tension betul aku!

Mulai ketika ini, aku akan mula tulis surat untuk kekasih masa depan aku. Kerana sekarang I miss her so much.

Friday, February 19, 2010

No Tajuk...Tulisan Picisan

Hidup penuh ironi.

Perang dingin keluarga. Perang tapi tak bercakap. Haizzz...orang tua. Lucu benar.

Chill sudei....aku punyala korban tido pagi nie nak bersiap pg kenduri kt Dungun n tunggu punyalah jadah lama, TAK JADI ?? panas btul lah.

Ke married life memang mcm ni ? Boleh ribut dengan tiba2 ?

Apapun.....

Cuba lihat fairy tales tagihan kanak kanak sekarang. Nanti aku akan bagitahu anak aku bila dia membebel how unfair it is for sleeping beauty kena curse.

"do you know that it's the parents' fault the princess kena curse ??!! The poor old witch is just offended for not being invited to the kenduri. Poor that mak cik you know ??"

And the same goes to the other tales. Too many bad formulations in these fairy tales.

Aku ingat cuti ni bolehla aku goyang punggung je rehat mcm Sin Chan. Analisa short stories "A Late Encounter With The Enemy" and "Girl" memang haram macam makan babi. Jamaica Kincaid ni memang nak kena.

Tapi good thing to know, humans should ada mata lebih dari dua. Just in case stupidity kicks in la kan?

Maaflah. Aku rasa cirit birit mempengaruhi idea aku.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

I TOLD

It happened. Finally.

I spoke, had no gut though and found a fracture one.

Emotion was unslung. The heart was recumbent.

Normally it would be the time I would let the red chaperon talk me out of telling. The poor small scared cat finally ran out outpouring from the filthy bag. How it inhaled the air it never breathed before.

This time, crying, I told someone. Surrendering a mountain of plight. The cloud above is a solace of broken pieces. Down the river, are those black dead guppies.

I felt the rain on my cheek. Those pugnacious drops were warm.

"The sins against God"

Nurture good but nature?

Then I read and keep busy. So I won't fall (again)........

But finally, I told.
"Yes, it was oral"